LifestyleRelationships I Dont Know How To Date. by: – June 29, 2011 Sharing is caring! 37 Views no discussions Share Tweet Share Share I don’t know how to date. This has come to my attention in recent weeks, months, or more specifically, the last 15 years or so. Every relationship I’ve ever had, I’ve just sort of fallen into where dating wasn’t really part of the equation. I always thought I was lucky in this regard, but I no longer feel that way.To me, dating is the worst. I do not care for it at all. And to be honest, most first dates rarely end up in a second, because I’m wonky and my social skills are definitely a bit questionable. Getting through a date is more stressful for me than fun; in fact, I find I’m more relaxed when I go to the gynecologist.Recently, I went out with a gentleman caller. He was a friend of a friend. I was forced into it as some sort of distraction for a recent falling out with an on-again, off-again love interest who ended up falling so below par that being with him became heartbreaking and disappointing.I had tried to emotionally prepare myself for the date (read: had a martini and a Xanax before heading out the door), and had also cried out any possible tears that might pop out later in the evening, as I am a bit on the emotional side lately. I had also gone to the effort of putting on lipstick and even shaved my legs right before just in case things got hot and heavy. I’ll actually admit my reason for going on the date was more to hoping to get laid than find some lasting sort of relationship. This, I fear, is the boy in me.The martini and Xanax were a bad idea, of course. Halfway through the dinner, I proceeded to tell my date that I didn’t know how to date, that I hated dating and that I didn’t care to go through the process of ever getting to know anyone because I already knew everyone I wanted to know except for Ryan Gosling. Furthermore he, my date, should know that I already met my soulmate, and although he was probably drunk in a gutter somewhere in Bushwick, as I spoke those words, someday, it was going to make sense and said soulmate and I were going to get our s— together and it was going to be perfect in a fantasy world with pink unicorns and bunnies named Fred. Yes, that’s what I told my date in a round about way. I have not heard from him since.Of course this makes perfect sense, because had someone told me some malarkey about pink unicorns and bunnies named Fred, I, too, would avoid them like the plague, and I like those things.So I went home and had a moment similar to the one Annette Bening had in American Beauty – the one where she cries and smacks herself to stop being such a baby. I didn’t smack myself with my hand, but rather with words. And in the moment I was forced to recall the so many first dates I’ve been on, and all the reasons they never resulted in a second. Granted, 70% of the time the choice to not have a second date was mine because I have obscenely unrealistic standards and again live in a fantasy world where everything is perfect. However, that 30% was not in my control. I had literally lost the chance for another chance for the same reason I had with my most recent suitor: I just don’t know how to date.I don’t know how to make small talk and have it involve into topics more interesting. I don’t care to ask questions or even offer up any information about myself. I don’t try to be charming, because it seems like such a waste since I’ve convinced myself that there are only three people who have ever existed for me in the history of the world and two are dead – F. Scott Fitzgerald and Henry Miller – and the other is drunk in a gutter in Bushwick. I am absolutely completely closed off and by most accounts a curmudgeon. Women my age should not be this way so early in the game, but I am. This does not make me innovative or even a maverick; it makes me a narrow-minded a—- . Someone please tell me why there isn’t a class out there I could take to remedy this issue, or at least teach me how to be more relatable to the opposite sex so there is the slightest hope of eventually procreating with someone, anyone.This weekend, I’m going to try this dating thing again. Once again, a friend is setting me up. I have already decided there will be no pre-gaming in my apartment, no mention of my soulmate – although he is, FYI – nor will I bring up anything about mythical animals or my disappointment in the whole dating process. No, instead I will do what they do in the movies and smile a lot. I will laugh at jokes that aren’t funny and put my wonky ways on hold for the evening if only to prove to myself that I can get to a second date and maybe even a third or fourth. Although to be honest, a don’t see a fifth one happening… by then I will have unleashed the real me and that takes a certain breed to be able to handle that level of madness, er, uniqueness.Here’s hoping it’s just a “not enough practice” thing as opposed to a “missing the dating gene” thing, but I guess only time will tell.by Thegloss Dotcom
Jamaica’s Sunshine Girls crushed Caribbean neighbors Barbados, to win their fourth straight game in Pool A of the Commonwealth Games in Australia on Monday.Playing at the Gold Coast Convention and Exhibition Center, the powerhouses stamped their authority on the contest from early to come away with a 76-32 victory.While the result kept the Sunshine Girls unbeaten in the competition, it represented the second defeat for the Barbadians, who suffered a similar hammering in their opening game to hosts and world champions Australia.Jamaica were spearheaded by goal shooter Jhaniele Fowler-Reid who scored 32 from 36 attempts while Romelda Aiken shot 28 from 33, in her time also at goal shooter.Goal attack Shanice Beckford supported with 12 goals from 14 attempts.Barbados were never given the chance to get going and goal shooter Latonia Blackman was limited to 17 from 19 attempts.Jamaica wasted little in charging to a 22-9 lead at the first quarter, an advantage which they converted into a 39-15 half-time lead to put the contest virtually out of sight.It was more of the same in the third quarter as the Jamaicans outscored Barbados 18-7 to lead 57-22 at the start of the final stanza, and they pressed home their advantage down the stretch to close out strongly.Jamaica’s biggest test will come on Wednesday when they clash with the Aussies in their final outing of the preliminaries.Barbados, meanwhile, take on Northern Ireland on Tuesday before wrapping up their preliminary campaign against South Africa on Wednesday.
Our #Isles STARS of game 4️⃣!⭐️ @RobinLehner⭐️⭐️ @jeberle_7⭐️⭐️⭐️ @Bnelson pic.twitter.com/dXDp4wwpLi— x – New York Islanders (@NYIslanders) April 17, 2019“We have come a long way,” Islanders captain Anders Lee said postgame. “Obviously, nobody predicted this.”Forward Jake Guentzel set the tempo early, scoring the Penguins’ first goal just 35 seconds into the game. However, much like the rest of the series, the Islanders wasted no time in tying the game as Jordan Eberle scored 1:34 later to tie the game at 1-1.Eberle scored one goal in each of the series four games and his six points are the fourth-most in the postseason, trailing Mark Stone and Paul Stasny (eight) and Matt Duchene (seven).Jordan Eberle of the @NYIslanders is the third player in the last seven years to score in each of his team’s first four games of a postseason.The others to do so since 2012: Sean Monahan (w/ CGY in 2017 vs ANA) and Patrick Marleau (w/ SJS in 2013 vs VAN). #NHLStats #StanleyCup pic.twitter.com/vvND91tGUI— NHL Public Relations (@PR_NHL) April 17, 2019Later in the opening period, Brock Nelson tallied his third goal of the series, giving the Islanders a lead they would not relinquish. Josh Bailey added an empty-net insurance goal with 38 seconds left in the game to seal the win.The Islanders limited the Penguins to just six goals in series, a byproduct of goalie Robin Lehner’s solid play. Pittsburgh only got 6 pucks past @NYIslanders netminder @RobinLehner! #NHLTonight #StanleyCup pic.twitter.com/5eFF5d4Hnq— NHL Network (@NHLNetwork) April 17, 2019The series-clinching win was not without its setbacks as the Islanders lost a pair of defensemen to injury. Johnny Boychuk took a Marcus Pettersson slap shot off his left leg seven minutes into the second period. Cal Clutterbuck left the game later in the period after he checked Penguins winger Bryan Rust. Neither man returned to the game, forcing the Islanders to hang on to their lead in the third period shorthanded. For the first time since they clinched the 1983 Stanley Cup, the New York Islanders have swept a postseason series.New York defeated the Pittsburgh Penguins 3-1 at PPG Paints Arena Tuesday night to continue their improbable run. Not expected to compete for a postseason spot this season — much less complete a sweep of the team that has won two of the last three Stanley Cups — the Islanders became the first team to sweep Pittsburgh out of the playoffs since the Blackhawks in 1972. Islanders head coach Barry Trotz could not provide an update on either player postgame. However, now that the Islanders have advanced, they will face either the Carolina Hurricanes or the Washington Capitals in the next round.If the Capitals can build on a 2-1 series and advance, that sets the stage for Trotz to coach against the team he led to the Stanley Cup last season.“I know Washington quite well,” Trotz said.